13.03.2025

7 TECHNIQUES TO CAPTURE UNKNOWN COLLEAGUES

You're so tired that you'd rather go home after work than go to that event your partner or competitor invited you to.

Make an effort and go, otherwise you will make a big mistake.

Even the cocktail is not entertainment, but part of your official duties. If it is a company you work with, they will write you a black mark for the absence, because they will consider it disrespectful.

Also, there is no doubt that communicating in an informal environment helps business. By meeting colleagues from a competing company and with other people in the industry, you will learn interesting things that will be useful for your career. You might hear that there's a job opening somewhere that's right for you, and you might consider a job change.

Many people do not like going to informal events, not because they do not appreciate their importance, but because communication does not come easily to them. This skill is learned and you will quickly become cute with simple tricks.

Most of them are very common, but you need to understand well how you should apply them to have the desired effect. And some are quite different from what your mother taught you were brought up to do.

1. Delayed smile. All communications professionals advise to smile. That's right, but don't stick a smile like lipstick on your lips. It will look like a mask.

The proper way to get together informally is to consistently appear welcoming, not sullen. When you see someone you know, don't immediately burst into a smile. Look the person in the eye for a second or two and then smile slowly. It's called "hearty", which means sincere, although your smile should reach another organ - the eyes.

This is the way for the person to understand that your smile is not some frozen grimace, not for everyone around, but meant for him. They call it those seconds of delay.

2. Attractive look. After you start a conversation, look the other person in the eye as if you are trying to attract them. He should get your full attention and feel special to you. When there are a lot of people around, it's hard not to get distracted, but try not to let it go. If you have to look away, do so slowly, as if reluctantly.

Staring, especially at a stranger and even more so from a woman to a man, is considered indecent. However, this is a daring technique to introduce a colleague at an event. He will notice your insistence, be interested, and probably talk to you himself. Surely he went with the same purpose - to communicate. If he doesn't, you approach, introduce yourself and strike up a conversation. This is not only permissible, but mandatory in such places. There is not much benefit in talking only to acquaintances and not making new contacts.

3. Enthusiastic fan. If the person is very important and high-ranking, you can ask one of the hosts to introduce you. Think carefully about what you're going to say to make him remember you. There are probably dozens of other people who want to meet him, so you have to do something to impress him.

Specialists advise, for example, not to simply introduce yourself as "Georgi Vlaikov/Bilyana Antonova, financial manager at...", but to add something about the position and your company in order to arouse the curiosity of your interlocutor.

There is nothing to stop you from even saying "your admirer" at the end if you are really getting to know a person in the profession whom you admire. It is not a "dump", but a normal way of professional communication.

4. Pointed ears. The most unpleasant thing about such gatherings is when you don't know anyone, and the hosts don't think to be among the guests and introduce them to each other. You should not stand in awkward isolation or leave quickly. You have to get to know yourself by doing two things that are generally considered impolite - eavesdropping and intruding.

There are usually enough people experienced in communication who create groups around themselves even when they find themselves in a completely unfamiliar environment. Choose a company you want to join. Come closer and listen to what they are talking about. Wait for a line to latch on to and slip into the conversation gracefully. If you have found something relevant and intriguing to say, you will immediately engage in the most natural way among the interlocutors.

5. Joyful signals. In all encounters - wanted or not - act as if you were seeing an old friend. This does not mean to be familiar, but to show joy, as if meeting an acquaintance after a long separation. This preset subconsciously triggers a reaction throughout your body. It starts sending signals to the person that you like them. Instinctively, he reciprocates.

When you approach a colleague in this way, with whom you meet on your own initiative, you shower him with your positive aura and help yourself with difficult first lines, which are often too prosaic. They are, of course, important to strike up a conversation, but by showing joy you have already made 80% of the good impression to make contact.

6. On a wave. Further, in order to get a dialogue, you need to pay attention to the mood of your interlocutor and get in tune with it. Watch the expression on his face, watch the so-called body language, listen to his voice. You won't get along with someone who's a little bored by the event if you shower them with too much excitement. Don't pretend you're bored too, just tone down the pathos a bit.

It looks like adjusting to the interlocutor, and it is exactly that, but it is not indecent, but very useful, especially in the first moment of acquaintance.

In the second, absorb everything said and catch clues to his preferred topics. By talking about something he likes, you will become closer. Well, he might love it so much that he can't stop, and you'll have to listen mainly. But consider whether it's worth it and how to elegantly get out if it's not.

If you want to continue the conversation, but without actively participating in it - for example, not to tell anything about your plans or about your company, but it is important for you that the colleague from a competing company says as much as possible, do not shy away from parrot repetition. When your interlocutor falls silent a little, do not pick up the topic, but repeat his last words "So you've been working on this all day." That way you put the ball back in his court, then all you have to do is listen.

7. Manipulation of applause. With people you know before, really treat them like old friends. You will immediately convince them that this is the case if you immediately remind them of something from your last meeting. Once they have told you something about their family, ask them about their loved ones. Intimacy is not unacceptable, they will be glad.

When you are in a larger company, recall stories that the person has told you or that you have witnessed and they can shine with them. He'll appreciate your gesture of making him the center of attention, and he'll be yours.

--- Slightly extravagant advice ---

Experts recommend that you make it easier to communicate at an informal gathering by making an effort to stand out from the crowd of other people who will be attending.

Wear something unusual that will get you noticed, will give people a reason to approach you and ask what it is. It could be an interesting badge/brooch, say.

Look around at other people - unusual things about them are also an opportunity to get to know each other. It's not rude. Since this trick is not unknown in business circles, this is probably why people excel at something.

However, it is imperative that you keep your highlighter in moderation so that you don't look ridiculous.