16.01.2025
THE HORROR OF THE PERPETUALLY DISSATISFIED BOSS AND TECHNIQUES TO DEAL WITH IT
It's quite stressful to work with a perpetually disgruntled boss. You make an effort, you do everything the best you can, and he still has objections. It's not personal to you, it's to everyone on the team and to the whole team.
The most logical way out, of course, is to save yourself by looking for another job. But for various reasons, this is not always possible, so you should try to endure.
You will manage after analysis.
Your boss is probably the most common type - forever criticizing because he is convinced that he can do the job better.
In many cases it is true - he rose to a managerial position for a reason. However, for her, he lacks a basic quality - to be able to lead employees so that they do the work as well as possible.
Managing people requires skills quite different from executive skills. Even the fact that a boss will mumble and give detailed instructions while subordinates handle tasks as perfectly as he would, does not make him a good manager. Even worse is a boss who takes it upon himself to do the work because his employees can't or he thinks they can't.
Often times, the boss criticizes not because he can do the job better, but because he thinks that dissatisfaction with his subordinates goes with his position. Not to forget themselves, but to know that more and more is required of them.
This leadership style is extremely unpleasant because it is usually accompanied by more off-putting personality traits. The boss may be highly controlling, unfair, blame-shifting, arrogant, fond of backstabbing, etc. extras.
In both cases, the question is how to do it so that you don't get on your nerves with the eternal remarks of the superior.
The first is to accept that this is who he is, nothing is likely to change him. Therefore, you must change yourself.
Be prepared that he will not be satisfied, no matter how you coped with the task, no matter how successful you were.
Do not be angry either internally or externally. It's stupid to poison yourself. He may be a bad manager, he may be a bad person, but why punish yourself for him.
Don't allow yourself to get demotivated either, because you know that you won't wait for not only praise, but even a "well done". Yes, the behavior of the boss is disgusting. Yes, injustice hurts. But you are not working for his "bravo", but for the salary and your own satisfaction to get things done as befits a professional and self-respecting person.
Also, if you start performing your tasks sloppily, the boss will have every right to criticize, and then you will be in the weak position.
Once you've told yourself you're not going to get angry with your perpetually disgruntled boss, you can take steps to minimize the criticism.
A perfect way to do this is to involve your supervisor in the execution of tasks in a very carefully measured way. When he feels that he has participated in every single step, his critical pathos will sensibly decline.
He's not a fool, he knows how closely he's been involved. It's like he's not happy with himself. Even if there are objections, they will be how to do it together better. They will not be like a subordinate who is sloppy, incompetent, or anything else of that unpleasant order. Because he experiences a split personality - he is both the boss and involved in the work as a contractor.
This trick is super effective when your boss is really good at his job and that's why he got promoted. He can add sparkle to any project you do, so try to involve him not only so that he doesn't criticize you, but also to learn from him.
It is more complicated when the boss is not a good person and thanks to his intervention, the work will turn out even worse. But again, involve him as much as possible in her performance, and he'll end up getting criticized anyway.
So that the blame does not fall on you, see that you have received instructions in writing or in front of witnesses.
And when you know what it is like, judge in advance what it might displease and cleverly pick it up from there. Let's say this: "Boss, your idea helped a lot and this is what happened". In this way, you recall his own "merits". Although he still won't accept that he was wrong, and will think that his subordinates are idiots who don't understand how things work, the critical pathos will probably be a little toned down.
When you involve the superior in your own work, you have to very precisely dose and judge your approach. You shouldn't look like an incompetent employee who can't cope and needs to be guided.
You have found the measure if it seems to his boss that you are suggesting, checking with him, seeking his opinion, because he is extremely experienced, smart, creative and other such things that flatter him.
Naturally, you don't need to say them directly, but make it so that he thinks about them himself, interpreting your behavior.
The truth is, working with a boss who can never say "well done" is the exact opposite of inspiring. It's exhausting. But you shouldn't let it demotivate you, because you'll hurt your career.
Try to do your tasks as professionally as possible and don't stop looking for another place. In no case do not allow yourself to be discouraged that you will find him, and to get used to the manner of your perpetually dissatisfied superior.
Don't settle, search and believe that not all bosses are like that.
----- How to behave when criticizing you -----
What can we say, there are many bosses who can't benevolently and tactfully give the so-called feedback. That's why it's wiser to deal with criticism by managing the feelings you feel, sociologist Joseph Greney advises.
"I have spent most of my life believing that the best way to help people who receive negative feedback is to teach those who criticize them to improve the way they express themselves. I am now convinced, that it was a mistake," he adds.
Grenney outlines four steps that can help you stay calm and respond productively to criticism.
